Thursday OYSTERS

                                  Al's Most Recent

Quote of the day:

“Masochists are those that have confused pain with pleasure. But the rest of us have confused television with entertainment, Doritos with food and Hillary Clinton with a political leader. Perhaps the masochists have better grasp on reality than the rest of us.”

P. J. O'Rourke

The original quote named Dan Quayle as the political leader but I have exercised my artistic license.

A local celebrity here in town stirred my conscience. She reminded all of us about how cold it is going to get and how many churches and synagogues there are that are nothing but mausoleums. They are heated and have room for thousands especially the televangelists and their enormous “temples”. I really don't know if they open their doors for the homeless on cold nights or not...but I am not optimistic. I know for sure that one church in my downtown area does allow the homeless to sleep inside while there are no services in progress.

Here is another episode of my hunting and fishing adventures. Again a friend and I went duck hunting in Alaska. We learned our lesson about hunting on mud flats and this time we were in the muskeg (swamp) not affected by the tide. I was in my trusty hip waders once again along with camo top to bottom. We waded out into the muskeg to a point that was relative clear of trees so we could see the birds coming. We sat down on a log and waited. A short while later a woman waded out and took a seat on another log on our right front. She was so close we could tell what type of shotgun she had. It was a Fox 16 gauge double barrel. Soon thereafter we saw a duck coming right at us. The woman saw it too. The duck was going to fly between us and the woman and it was no higher than four feet off the water. We decided to let this one go by because of the danger of hitting the woman. The woman did not see it that way and drew down on the duck and pulled a lead and began a track. My friend and I looked at each other and said to each other “Nah, she ain’t going to shoot knowing we were here since she walked right beside us to get to her log.” Then we heard her click off the safety and we just slid off into the water and hid behind the log with our shotguns (12 Gauge Ithaca Featherweight) held above the water. She indeed fired and the blast went over our heads by inches. There were a few chips in the stocks of our guns. Her shot was on target and the duck landed less than three feet from us and the woman came after it. When we rose up, she acted startled and said “I did not know you were there.” We said “That’s OK, we were just leaving.” By the way, when we went walked into or out of the muskeg we had three slugs loaded instead of duck shot just in case a grizzly should appear. They were normally bedded down for the winter by then but why take a chance? I know what you are going to say, I should give up duck hunting.

              This Date in History   January 7

1776 On this date super patriot Samuel Adams wrote a letter to his friend James Warren stating that the hope for a confederation amongst the American Colonies is not dead,”but sleepeth”. He also said that neither he nor James needs to worry about it happening because their enemy, England, would force it upon them. The next day Samuel’s cousin, John Adams, wrote a letter to James Warren’s wife Mercy inquiring if she would prefer an American Monarchy (king) or a republic (what we have now). He regaled her with the virtues of a republic but he said:

”There is so much rascality, so much venality and corruption, So much avarice and ambition, such a rage for profit and commerce among all ranks levels of men even then I doubt there is enough virtue to support a Republic.”

That statement was made by one of our founding fathers over 220 years ago. Does it sound familiar? There was a meeting in Philadelphia soon after this where the core of the designers of this great nation met to determine what form of government we would pursue. After the meeting, Ben Franklin walked out and a woman waiting outside said “What is it going to be Mr. Franklin.” Ben said “It will be a republic, madam, if we can hold it.”

1901 In November of 1873 a man named Alferd Packer led a group of 21 men out of Bingham Canyon, Utah acting as a guide headed for the gold fields near Breckenridge, Colorado. The winter of 1873-1874 was an exceptionally harsh one and the men eventually staggered into the camp of Ute Chief Ouray. Ouray graciously welcomed the men and fed them and allowed them to rest. He also encouraged them to wait until the grip of winter was broken before proceeding. After being refreshed by food and rest, Packer and five others decided to head out in spite of Ouray’s warning. As you might expect, these six men eventually ran out of food and energy and made camp. Two months later Packer walked into the Las Pinas Indian Agency alone looking surprisingly healthy considering the story he told about his ordeal. Packer said that the men he was guiding began to die from starvation and exposure and the others ate them for survival. Packer further said that eventually there were only he and a man named Shannon Bell left. He said the Bell went crazy as hell and attacked with a hatchet and Packer had no choice but to shoot in self defense. The story sounded plausible until an investigation showed 5 corpses in a small area, not strung out as stated by Packer. Packer went on trial and was convicted of manslaughter and served 18 years. On this date Packer was released. He told yet another tale after he got out. He said that he had left the camp to go find the trail and after he returned he was faced with Shannon Bell holding a bloody hatchet and the others dead and a pot on the fire was boiling with a human roast inside. When Bell saw Packer he charged with his hatchet aloft and Packer shot him twice in the stomach killing him. Packer admitted that after killing Bell he cut off some selected parts and took them with him for survival. This version seemed the most palatable (pardon the expression). If I am not mistaken, the students at Harvard vote every year for the worst restaurant in Cambridge and give it “The Alferd Packer Award”. By the way, he spelled it “Alferd” rather than “Alfred”...spelling was not his long suit.

1953 In his final “State of the Union” address President Harry Truman announced that the United States has developed a hydrogen bomb. The development of a hydrogen bomb had been allowed because of the detonation of a nuclear device by the Russians in 1949 and the arms race was under way. Finally, a treaty was reached whereby atmospheric testing of nuclear devices was banned. Then everybody went to underground testing. The scorpion was out of the bottle y’all. Now everybody has a nuclear weapon including Pakistan and India, for crying out loud.

Born today:

1800 United States President Millard Fillmore. He said “May God save our country for it is obvious the people will not.”

1891 US writer Zora Hurston. She said “Those that don’t have it can’t show it. Those that have it can’t hide it.”

1957 US television journalist Katie Couric. She said “If I were to come on the air in the morning and announce that the planet was going to explode in three hours, we would get calls about my hair.” Yes Katie, people are shallow.

Died today:

1981 US writer William Feather. He said “An indictment against civilization is that happiness and intelligence is seldom found in the same person.”

             Thanks for listening   I can hardly wait until tomorrow